The Choice to Move Forward

As I reflect back on my life with HIV, two realizations come to me; One - At 59 I have lived with HIV for more than half my life and; Two - I don't remember much of the bad stuff.
...living with HIV is not what defines me.
I’ve had rough times and believed I could suffer nothing more devastating, but I don't remember details. All that comes to mind when I try is how wonderfully supportive my family and friends were during these trying moments in my life. I can only remember their smiles and words of encouragement and how it gave me strength and made me believe everything was going to be okay. How a smile would brighten my day and light my way. How it feels to be loved and in love, how to let go and take it all in. Life!

These days my HIV is managed well enough that I don't need to think about it much, I have other pressing matters to worry about like, what do I feel like having for breakfast? Or what is that soreness in my back? Or what color socks will I wear. Everyday stuff fills my daily activities rather than worrying about an eating and medication schedule from some mad scientist's cookbook.
Getting knocked down in life is a GIVEN, getting up and moving forward is a CHOICE.
-Zig Ziglar

All I'm trying to say here is "It does get better!" You will remember the good memories easier than bad memories; living with HIV is not what defines me. The key is to reach out and say what it is you need and involve those around you in your daily life.

-Chris, 34 years

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